Thursday, July 26, 2007

Doctor's Orders!

I don't think I will ever get use to having to remove my clothes for those dreaded doctor's visits. You would think after all my children, this would change. NOT. I still feel the boiling hot, rush of blood to my cheeks as I lie on the examining table. The objects hanging overhead do nothing to distract me. In fact, I think they are more of a reminder of where you are and why, as was the situation with me the last time.

I am just as nervous each and every visit no matter how confident I appear as I stroll through those giant doors. This time was no exception. I signed in and sat down only moments before they called me into the back. The nurse showed me the paper gown I had been chosen to don, whereupon I nervously asked the wisest question of the moment "Do I have to take off all my clothes?" Before she could answer I acknowledged that I knew I did *blush* *blush* and didn't know why I asked that. She just smiled and said that everyone always ask that same question. At least this made me feel a little better knowing I wasn't the only one.

She walked out of the room and I turned around to remove my clothes and vanity. I put on the little paper gown and smiled to myself upon remembering my last visit where I had made an already embarrassing situation worse. How? You may ask. Well, I, being the creature of habit that I am, remembered that "the split always goes in the back" right? Wrong! Seems the split goes in the front and no one had thought to tell me.

Now that I had totally went against manufacturer's intentions *gasp* I was even more uncomfortable when the dr. had to tear it open at the neck. You know,....for the other part of the exam. Even though he was very understanding about it I was feeling....well.......I'm going to go ahead and say it......a little "blonde." There. I said it. *smile*

Thankful for no major problems, I followed up with the mammogram as he suggested. Ladies, I must say that I have heard "horror stories" about these. I went in expecting to have nothing left on my chest, but pancakes! Now, I am no expert since I have had only one before this one, but mine were not as painful as I had prepared for. I don't know if it's the fact that I have such a wonderful technician (thanks Renata) or that I have experienced far worse pain associated with previous surgeries that this just paled in comparison. I was a little sore afterwards, but nothing major.

I mentioned to Renata some of the stories others had expressed to me about mammograms. Some of you may even have gotten the satirical emails about them. I have and found them to be quite funny. She laughed at first, but then she said something very wise. "YOU CAN HANDLE A MAMMOGRAM MUCH BETTER THAN YOU CAN HANDLE BRE*ST CANCER."

Although I shared my embarrassing moments on the lighter side, I hope all my friends will take the message seriously and GET THOSE EXAMS!!

Tuesday, July 24, 2007