Lights!

Yay for me! I finally got the lights on the tree tonight! It took me awhile. It wasn't an easy task as I had Nathan sifting through the ornament boxes and pulling out beads, hooks, and the likes. Having to stop and re-direct his attention put me behind, but wore him out sooner than I expected. It wasn't long before he had that sleepy time look on his face and a wisp of his hair in his fingers. This is his usual bedtime ritual and one that I am happy to see. He was out in no time, giving me a little peace before having to clean up all the strewn boxes. I think that is on reason I dread pulling everything out. I know it will be up to me to get it all back in one place and tidy up. Whew! Like I don't have enough to do! Ahhh, but how "homey" it is and quiet right now without my little man running through here. I tried to teach him that once the ornaments went on the tree, we do not take them off to play with them. I'll let you know later if it was a lesson learned.


As I was fixing my "new" hair today, I thought of a wonderful weightloss idea. I was thinking if I would take a photo of myself in that tight, plastic cap, and post it on the fridge and in my wallet, it might detour some of my UNnecessary "chewing of the chocolate" What 'cha think?

How Many Days???

Since I can't post a picture of my tree, (I'm sorry, it is in a box somewhere) I decided to post a candle. It is festive looking I think.




I don't think I have ever been this late putting up my tree. We are now out of the twenty-something days, to the teens. I am behind schedule and can't seem to catch up. Why is it when one plan seems to fall apart, it lays the foundation for the next one to come unwrangled? Now that I think about it, my week pretty much started off in that manner. I can remember thinking to myself Sunday afternoon, " I should have stayed home." I have learned to repeat this phrase to no one except myself,(and under my breath, only then) unless I want to start a battle of the bands with my DH. In the essence of the season, I prefer "peace on earth" and definitely "goodwill toward men."

I have a hair appointment today and can't sleep tonight. I want something different. I am at that age that long hair is too "young" for me and short hair is too "old" for me. Besides the fact that neither perform the slimming ability that I desire! If only I could exit from the establishment with a complete body makeover! I mean, c'mon, we're been sending people to the moon for years now and we're no closer to have a fat reducing device developed? It's just depressing to go in and have that plastic cap strapped on my head and realize the full reality of my "full" facial features. Very unattractive without hair. I will continue the cycle of looking at the "Hair" mags and decide on one, only to "chicken out" at the last minute. Yeah, just give me my old dirty blonde. I actually prefer it over the gray.

It's finally cool enough for me to enjoy my tea! In case ya'll didn't know, I love hot tea. It is one of my most favorite things. Of course weather has no bearing on if I drink it or not. Orange spice is definitely a favorite choice. I found a new brand at Cracker Barrel. It was packaged in a tin. I usually buy the ones in boxes, but saw this and wanted to try. I'm glad I did. It's not too strong. I usually indulge my addition after the family is in bed for the night. It helps me to relax and in some way it is a comfort to me. I don't have many friends that share my love for hot tea. Most like plain old iced tea. Don't get me wrong, I am as southern as they are. I like ice tea also, and drink it as well, but there's something about a pot of tea and delicate tea cup that brings out the southern belle in me. Since I also collect tea pots, I can use different ones depending on what type of mood I'm in.

I wanted to get my tree up tonight, but that has been a failure. I did, however, get my festive candle arrangement atop my table. I went to one of my fave arts and crafts place and picked out the little do dads that I needed and voila! My Christmas centerpiece is born! I lit the candle and stood by and watched Nathan. He was amazed and wanted to blow out the candle after thirty minutes. I can handle that better as opposed to him trying to pull it off the table. I think this is one of the reasons I haven't been more diligent in getting the tree up. I know it is going to be a battle with Nathan and the ornaments. Ahh the joys of motherhood. I love my little man. He sure keeps me busy.

Soul Searching

I wanted to come on tonight and post about my great weekend, but I have other things going on inside my heart and mind. I am being confronted with feelings that I thought were long gone. Feelings of anger and unforgiveness. I was hurt so deeply by someone, (believer) that I didn't know if I would ever get over it, but through much prayer, (for them as well as myself,) I thought I had lain it to rest. Not because they had ask for my forgiveness, they didn't, but I know that as a christian, I have to forgive anyway, right? Believe me, it was a struggle, but I want to cleave to what I know is right and not reward evil for evil.

Here I am tonight twelve years later, yes, twelve years and I have questions. Questions that have been brought to the surface because I had a face to face encounter with her tonight. I guess you could tell by the twelve year comment that I haven't seen or talked to her in that period of time. I had gone to a Christmas Cantata at another church to support one of my friends. She had a solo and after all she has endured in the past year or so, I wanted to be there for her. The church was almost full to capacity, but even with all the hundreds of faces in the crowd, I saw her!


I continued to enjoy the cantata without letting that bother me. I had actually "psyched" myself up to be cordial and natural as possible in the event our paths crossed at the finale. Well, so much for the psych. Our paths did cross. I thought I was doing great. I made it a point to speak to her as casually as I could and tried to keep walking in the passing. It didn't work. She had to turn around and come back. The fact that I even spoke to her may have been the motivation for that action. I had been smiling up to the point that she tried to hug me. I didn't push her away, neither did I show any outward emotion. It was all inside, not anger, but I just didn't want a hug from her. And that bothers me. If I truly have forgiven her, why did I not welcome her embrace? I was so sure the infraction was in the past. Tonight has stirred up many ponderings.