Unseen Arms

I was awakened in the middle of the night by the all too familiar feeling of a two year old's wiggling body. Nathan had stumbled into my room and into my bed. I knew something was wrong. He would fall off to sleep and immediately awake crying out loud. He didn't have a temperature. I had noticed he had a small cough the day before, but it didn't seem like anything to worry about. By the time morning had arrived, so had his temperature and my determination to get him to the doctor.

After calling the office, I loaded him up and off we went. I was informed that they would be closing early for New Year's Eve, so we didn't have time to waste. I dread these office visits. You may remember the frequency of ear infections that plague Nathan and his traumatic experience last year with the series of anitbiotic injections. He hasn't forgotten the pain associated with these visits.

He seemed to be fine until we were called into the examining room. He did not want to stay still. He was so glad to see the nurse leave. It wasn't long before the doctor came in to see him. He would not let him touch him. He had to be held down. He was screaming and flailing and had to be held. This is traumatizing to me. Is he thinking "why is my mama doing this to me?" or "why is she allowing this to happen?"
I know he doesn't realize that in the end it is for his benefit. How could he? He is too young to understand. I just hope his remembrance of these events will fade and he will trust me to know what is best for him.

Sinus infection and red ears. That was the diagnosis. We were off to get the prescriptions filled before the pharmacy closed. One antibiotic and a decongestant. The insurance wouldn't pay for the decongestant, so we had to do out-of-pocket. I hope it works. Either way, please say a little prayer for Nathan.

As I was typing this, I thought about how we "scream and flail" through some of life's painful experiences. We don't understand and may question why He is allowing this to happen. All the while, our precious Lord is holding us in His loving arms. I am so thankful for His grace.